We are back home!

2.5 weeks of holiday just flew by like that. Overall, it was a really good experience going on holiday with a 6 month old baby. Kieran was a very good flier. Better than myself I must say. I always get the bad earaches during descend but Kieran was so good that he didn't cry, whine and didn't even needed his pacifier. He was one happy baby. It was a little tiring for us as Kieran took a little longer to adjust to the changing time zones but he did it without excessive fuss.

I like the idea that we will always bring our children with us when we go on holiday. Afterall, they will only be willing to follow us around for maybe the 1st 12? years of their lives and then they will want to be on their own. Many parents are unwilling to bring their young children abroad as they worry that their kids may fuss etc. I think as long as we remember that everything has to go a little slower, you'll have more things to bring along, everything will be fine. I must say that this trip with Kieran was really fun!

Anyway, coming back to Singapore made me feel that sometimes our service industry is really quite lousy. Service people do not bother to go a little further with your enquiries, they even make it your fault that things do not go THEIR way! I was at Suntec's foodcourt just yesterday with Hubb and PP. We had to park the stroller by the walking aisle (next to the stalls) as that was the only place we could put it. There was still ample walking space after the stroller was placed there. However, the clearing attendant came by, casted a dirty look at us and started shaking his head at us, indicating that we blocked the entire passage way!!! It was only him who could not get across. Btw, there was still space if he was willing to go round the other end. In the US, people will go out of the way to make things easier for parents with strollers. It is not our fault that there was no provisions for strollers. Likewise, in Singapore, we often have to carry the strollers up and down steps as there is just no ramps to push the strollers on.

We like going to California all the time because of the fantastic shopping that we get there. We can get very nice (even brandful) clothes for Kieran for only USD1-3!!! For this price, we'll only get crappy clothes here!! I also like the way sales are really sales in there. Shops are willing to really slash prices during one-day sale (i.e. Black Friday). Also, when they have promotions for bulk purchases, you can save up to a few dollars on the items, unlike when our supermarkets do this, it's like "buy 1 @ $x, buy 3 and you'll save $0.10"!!! Very often you'll see the buy 10 items to save ads in US and you do not even have to buy 10 items and you'll get the item at the reduced price!

That's why we've been going back there for the last 3 years.. haha.. to do our annual shopping spree!!! :)

Blocked ducts!

Had a case of bad blocked ducts on the thursday before we left for the US! Went down to TMC and had it cleared. There was a white bleb and after the LC got the bleb out, and Kieran suckled, it was instant relief. The pain and swelling went down immediately! I thought that everything would be ok, but this problem has been recurring! I saw the bleb appearing again the day before. I managed to clear it and now it's back again. I can feel the same part of the boob hardening again. I think it's got to do with the time difference and Kieran drinking less milk at times where he would actually drink more. It really hurts when he is sucking on the sore breast! Got to get this problem fixed. Looks like I've got to clear it and massage it everyday just so that it doesn't recur! This is so weird, cos such things usually occur in the beginning stages of BF-ing and not when Kieran is already 6 months old!

Light a million candles

For the innocent children... please light a candle

http://www.lightamillioncandles.com/

Back to work

I've been back to work for the last week. I'm surprised that it hadn't been too difficult actually. Maybe I was so busy with all the things I had to do in school that I didn't really have time to miss PP. Then again, as Hubb would say," you are only in school for half a day what.. " Really, I think the main thing was that I DIDN'T have time to miss PP. The hours in school were divided between meetings, markings, breakfasts (this I like), pumpings. And the hours just flew by.

I must say that PP has been very well taken care of. I'm glad that he doesn't have any bad habits that are usually associated with kids taken care of by grandparents (due to over-pampering). He sleeps well and feeds fairly well.

Tomorrow is another school day again. I dread having to wake up so early in the morning and drag myself to school. I just do not get enough sleep that I'm usually sleepy by 10-11am in the morning. I still have a lot of work to do in school.. urgh..

I realise that I do like working. I enjoy the kind of stimulation I get from working. I guess it keeps me from becoming stupid. :) It's just that I have I have so little time with PP when I'm working. By the time we get back home, we have so little time to squeeze in playing, and reading to him. Everything has to be done is such a rush. It is either that or we are just too tired to do anything with him by then. I feel very bad when this happens, especially now that PP is becoming so alert and responsive. Sometimes I wonder if we are actually the bottleneck in his development. If we had more time with him, will we be able to read to him more, play with him more, help him in his development more?

Learning to let go

I’ve started bringing PP to MIL’s place to get him used to waking up in the morning and be taken care of by someone else. Actually, I think that the entire process is actually to get ME used to the idea that I am returning to work soon and I have to learn to let go.

I guess it is just every mother’s usual anxiety that their baby is leaving them. I know that it is a little extreme to say that my baby is leaving me (or me leaving my baby). I just can’t help but feel this way. In the last 4.5 month (5 next week), Kieran has been my everything. It’s been Kieran in the morning, Kieran in the afternoons and Kieran in the evenings. Still I want more of him.

Looking at the past few days that PP has been shuttled too and fro, I must admit that he is much more adaptable than I am. Maybe L was right. All he needs is someone to play with him, feed him and change his diapers. Does he still need Mummy? *self-doubt*

I know that he will be well-taken care of by his grandparents, who dote on him (he gets pampered a little more than I would like him to be actually). I guess I have to accept that things may not be done as exactly as I would like, but still, his grandparents will still do their best to make sure that their little grandson is comfortable and happy. I’m glad that there is Anita here, who also loves him and patiently pats him to sleep, changes his diapers and prepares his milk. Yes, I’m sure that PP will be well-taken care of.

With me going back to work, I guess PP can learn to be a little independent too. I don’t think it is too early to instill independence in a child. He will learn that we are here for him whenever he needs us, but he does not necessary need to see us all the time.

Even though I know that Kieran is in good hands, I still look forward to the day that I’ll be able to stay at home and watch him grow. I would love to see him take his first steps, say his first words and also to comfort him when he falls for the 1st time. I remember the exhilaration I felt when I saw him turn onto his front for the 1st time the other night. I wouldn’t want to miss all these.

In learning to let go of PP a little, I also have to refocus on my role as a wife and a partner to my neglected hubby. J I think I’ve neglected him ever since PP was born. It was initially PP all the time as we were trying to figure him out, later it became PP all the time because I couldn’t let him go. It should be L time now. Yes. It has to be this way. We also have to be role models to PP so that he grows up in an environment where he is loved and he sees that Mummy and Daddy are also very much in love.

Maybe it’s really good idea that I return to work for a little while.

Separation anxiety

I'll be returning back to school soon. Very soon actually. In about 3 weeks time. I think I am experiencing separation anxiety here. I have insomnia every night. I toss and turn in bed for 1-2hrs before I fall asleep ( and very often that's like 1-2 hrs before Kieran wakes up for his night feed).

I worry about loads of things. I worry if he will be able nap in the afternoons, whether there will be enough milk for him in the fridge, whether his cries will be understood.

I worry that his milk will be heated up too warmly for him, thus scalding him. Or that all the beneficial nutrients in his milk becomes lost because he is made to drink "hot" milk.

I worry about all the cigarette smoke that he may come in contact with (tho' we are working on that), I worry that he will be brought out without his car seat or with him seated in the front seat.

Most of all, I am going to miss his 'singing' and yelling for Mummy to help him reach for a toy or his smiles and gurgles when I play with him. I will also miss his wake-up, blurry smiles in the mornings...

Sigh...

Bad Breastfeeding Advice..

Found this on: http://www.mother-2-mother.com/bad-advice.htm

Finally!!

Bad Bfing advice
Here is a collection of ‘bad advice’ that many women are given in regard to breastfeeding from nurses, family, friends, etc. This bad advice is usually given with the very best intentions and is not meant to be ‘bad’. Please let me know if you have any questions about anything stated here!

*You must ‘prepare’ your nipples: rubbing with a towel/loofah/washcloth, pinching, pulling, etc.

Leave your nipples alone! Your nipples were designed to breastfeed. Do not do anything to them; nipple stimulation is a labor inducer. During your third trimester, you can put Lansinoh cream on them, but you shouldn’t have to do anything else. Once you are nursing, use only warm water to wash your breasts, as soap may dry your nipples.

*Don't put Lansinoh cream directly on your nipples; it will cause clogged ducts .

Put it right on them; that’s what it’s for. Also, it does NOT need to be washed off before baby nurses.

*Baby shouldn’t nurse more than every 3-4 hours or you’ll spoil her.

In the first few weeks, baby should eat at least every 3 hours-this is a minimum. It will often be closer to every 2 hours, as breastmilk digests in approximately 90 minutes. An increase in nursing time and frequency will happen during growth spurts, changes in routine, etc. Nurse on demand, as nursing is also a source of comfort for baby. You can never nurse too often; you can nurse too little. It’s a common thought that babies under 6 months cannot be spoiled.

*Switch breasts every 5-7 minutes, 10 minutes, etc.

Never watch the clock when you are nursing. Baby will tell you that he is done by pulling off of your breast or falling asleep. When baby is finished with one breast, offer the second, though baby may or may not take it.

*You must not have enough milk, your milk must be bad, you should use formula if: baby is nursing so often, for such long periods, you don’t think you are pumping enough, etc. Baby will go through growth spurts, may cluster feed, or have some ‘marathon’ nursing sessions for any number of reasons. It does NOT mean your supply is low or that your milk is ‘bad’. These increases in frequency will come and go, but they will not last forever. Continue to feed on demand.
Never, never, never look to length of time nursing or pumping output as a reliable indicator of your supply. To see if baby is getting enough milk, watch her number of wet diapers and if she’s content after eating. Weight gain and meeting developmental milestones is also a good indicator that she’s getting enough. Your baby nursing is much more efficient than even the best breast pump.

*It won’t hurt to give one bottle of formula, a pacifier, etc:

Both bottles and pacifiers can cause nipple confusion. With a bottle, baby may also decide he likes the faster flow of a bottle and may refuse the breast. Artificial nipples should only be introduced once nursing has been well established for a minimum of 3 weeks.
Milk production is a supply and demand process. If you give baby that one bottle of formula, your body will think baby doesn’t need as much milk, and will decrease your supply. With a lower supply, you will have to supplement with more formula, your body will continue to decrease your supply, and you’ll soon be down to nothing.

*Give baby a little cereal in a bottle; it will help him sleep through the night. Babies need NOTHING but breastmilk until at least 6 months of age. This cuts down on developing food allergies and gives the digestive tract time to mature. All babies are different, and giving cereal will not always guarantee sleeping through the night.

*There are no benefits to nursing past 6 months.

The six month mark recommended by the APA, WHO, etc. is a minimum. The benefits to baby and you will continue as long as you breastfeed. In cases where food allergies are expected, breastfeeding is recommended a full year.

*If you have a sore breast, don’t nurse with it for a day or two.

This can lead to a supply problem. Unless it’s very, very painful, you should nurse even a sore breast. It’s best to offer the healthy breast first, as baby will then be more gentle with the second breast. It’s best to see your doctor if you develop any problems ASAP.

*You can’t nurse if you’re sick.

The only illnesses that require you to stop breastfeeding are HIV/AIDS HTLV-1 and septicetmia from food poisioning. If you are sick, do continue to breastfeed-baby has already been exposed, and your milk will develop specific antibodies to whatever you have. If you are given medication, be sure your care provider knows you are breastfeeding. If a medication isn’t okay to take while breastfeeding, there is usually an alternative.

*Your baby isn’t getting enough milk when given a bottle.

Up to 6 months, an exclusively breastfed baby will only need approximately 3 ounces of breastmilk per feeding if eating every 3 hours, 2 ounces if eating every 2 hours. As baby grows, your breastmilk becomes more concentrated with the nutrients it produces. Formula doesn’t change, which is why it must be continually increased as baby grows. If baby seems to be eating significantly more than that, it’s most likely that the person giving baby the bottle isn’t adequately reading the signs that baby is finished.

*If baby is born and not producing enough wet diapers, you must supplement with formula.

If there is a problem with baby not getting enough milk, pumped breastmilk is a better alternative to formula. To avoid nipple confusion, baby should be fed with a medicine dropper, oral syringe, etc. Babies are born with extra water to carry them through until mom’s milk ‘comes in’, generally 3-5 days after giving birth.
*It is better bottle feed ... you can make your DH get up in the middle of the night to feed the baby. It isn't fair that you should have to do all the work. Okay, formula feeding is easier on mom. For about the first month, you will be the ONLY person that can feed her. This will take up a good portion of your post-partum time and energy. Dad and siblings need to realize that they’ll really have to do many of the chores: cleaning, cooking, laundry, etc.

*If your child is dehydrated, you must stop breastfeeding.

Baby will not need any supplements to prevent dehydration IF he/she is eating often. Pedialyte can be used in addition to breastmilk, but should not replace it. Breastmilk does not dehydrate like cow’s milk.

This list was compiled from "bad bf advice" given to moms from iVillage's Breastfeeding Support/Ask the LC board, and brought together for us here by Theresa. Thank you, moms, and thank you Theresa for sharing this with us!
Copyright © 2000 - 2006 Jim Yount

Why delay solids?

People have been coming up to me, telling me that K can start solids soon, i.e. next month (@ 4 mths). I've been trying to explain that I would prefer to delay it as late as possible, preferably 6 months. However, it's quite difficult as they (same people, different people...) keep come to me saying, it's ok to give solids already, rice cereal will not give allergies, baby will sleep through the night.. etc. So sometimes, it's quite tiring to have to explain myself! Times have changed. Research now shows that it is beneficial to delay solids until the baby is 6 months old and here's why!

Article taken from: http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/solids/delay-solids.html

Reasons for delaying solids

Although some of the reasons listed here assume that your baby is breastfed or fed breastmilk only, experts recommend that solids be delayed for formula fed babies also.

Delaying solids gives baby greater protection from illness.
Although babies continue to receive many immunities from breastmilk for as long as they nurse, the greatest immunity occurs while a baby is exclusively breastfed. Breastmilk contains 50+ known immune factors, and probably many more that are still unknown. One study has shown that babies who were exclusively breastfed for 4+ months had 40% fewer ear infections than breastfed babies whose diets were supplemented with other foods. The probability of respiratory illness occurring at any time during childhood is significantly reduced if the child is fed exclusively breast milk for at least 15 weeks and no solid foods are introduced during this time. (Wilson, 1998) Many other studies have also linked the degree of exclusivity of breastfeeding to enhanced health benefits (see Immune factors in human milk and Risks of Artificial Feeding).

Delaying solids gives baby's digestive system time to mature.
If solids are started before a baby's system is ready to handle them, they are poorly digested and may cause unpleasant reactions (digestive upset, gas, constipation, etc.). Protein digestion is incomplete in infancy. Gastric acid and pepsin are secreted at birth and increase toward adult values over the following 3 to 4 months. The pancreatic enzyme amylase does not reach adequate levels for digestion of starches until around 6 months, and carbohydrate enzymes such as maltase, isomaltase, and sucrase do not reach adult levels until around 7 months. Young infants also have low levels of lipase and bile salts, so fat digestion does not reach adult levels until 6-9 months.

Delaying solids decreases the risk of food allergies.
It is well documented that prolonged exclusive breastfeeding results in a lower incidence of food allergies (see Allergy References and Risks of Artificial Feeding). From birth until somewhere between four and six months of age, babies possess what is often referred to as an "open gut." This means that the spaces between the cells of the small intestines will readily allow intact macromolecules, including whole proteins and pathogens, to pass directly into the bloodstream.This is great for your breastfed baby as it allows beneficial antibodies in breastmilk to pass more directly into baby's bloodstream, but it also means that large proteins from other foods (which may predispose baby to allergies) and disease-causing pathogens can pass right through, too. During baby's first 4-6 months, while the gut is still "open," antibodies (sIgA) from breastmilk coat baby's digestive tract and provide passive immunity, reducing the likelihood of illness and allergic reactions before gut closure occurs. Baby starts producing these antibodies on his own at around 6 months, and gut closure should have occurred by this time also. See How Breast Milk Protects Newborns and The Case for the Virgin Gut for more on this subject.

Delaying solids helps to protect baby from iron-deficiency anemia.
The introduction of iron supplements and iron-fortified foods, particularly during the first six months, reduces the efficiency of baby's iron absorption. Healthy, full-term infants who are breastfed exclusively for periods of 6-9 months have been shown to maintain normal hemoglobin values and normal iron stores. In one study (Pisacane, 1995), the researchers concluded that babies who were exclusively breastfed for 7 months (and were not give iron supplements or iron-fortified cereals) had significantly higher hemoglobin levels at one year than breastfed babies who received solid foods earlier than seven months. The researchers found no cases of anemia within the first year in babies breastfed exclusively for seven months and concluded that breastfeeding exclusively for seven months reduces the risk of anemia. See Is Iron-Supplementation Necessary? for more information.

Delaying solids helps to protect baby from future obesity.
The early introduction of solids is associated with increased body fat and weight in childhood. (for example, see Wilson 1998, von Kries 1999, Kalies 2005)

Delaying solids helps mom to maintain her milk supply.
Studies have shown that for a young baby solids replace milk in a baby's diet - they do not add to baby's total intake. The more solids that baby eats, the less milk he takes from mom, and less milk taken from mom means less milk production. Babies who eat lots of solids or who start solids early tend to wean prematurely.

Delaying solids helps to space babies.
Breastfeeding is most effective in preventing pregnancy when your baby is exclusively breastfed and all of his nutritional and sucking needs are satisfied at the breast.

Delaying solids makes starting solids easier.
Babies who start solids later can feed themselves and are not as likely to have allergic reactions to foods.

Is there life after baby?

It seems that my life (and blog) just revolves around K these days. What to do? I'm a mother!! Nonetheless, I have to constantly remind myself that I am also a wife to the most wonderful husband that a girl can have.

I don't think I've been a fantastic wife ever since K was born. The house is in a mess, every conversation that Hubb has with me is either about how much milk K is drinking, how much I'm expressing, how many times K pooped/peed. I think I need to give a little more Hubby time! He's really fantastic though. He rushes home from school just to be with baby and me, knowing that I stay at home the entire day, he'll bring us out even though he's dead tired! So, here's a big !HUGZ! to the most wonderful Hubby and Daddy around!!

I never thought I'll be this happy, staying at home, going through cycles of feeding, bathing and diapering a baby. I used to want to excel in my career, have loads of other things. Guess my piorities have changed. I am content now. Kieran has brought me a new happiness that didn't existed before. It's a tiring job, but more satisfying than any other in the world.

I love seeing his gummy, drooly smile
I love catching hints of everyone I know in his baby face.
I love the way he smiles at me after being naughty, as though saying, sorry Mummy, I'm just having fun with you.
I love his gurgles and coos, especially when he makes appropriate sounds at appropriate moments, that stumps us and cracks us up.
I just love it that he's our baby!

And yes, there's still life after baby. Just that it's a different life. :)

3 month old baby sleeping so little?

I've been having sleepless nights! Not that I'm fussing over anything.. it's just that Kieran suddenly decides that he should wake up many many times at night to feed..!!
Last night was..
10pm
2am
5am

this was slightly better than the night before..
8pm
12mn
1am
3am
5.30am

What's up??

A different life.

I've left this in the draft for so many days and I just didn't have the time to complete it.. I shall just publish it as it is..

Many years ago, I wouldn't even imagine myself married/having kids at this age. I used to think that I would get married at 28 and probably have kids 2-3 years later. It's funny how decisions that you make can actually turn your entire life around. Right now i want to have all my kids as soon as possible. I want to be able to play with my children, run about with them in the parks, before I get too old and lack the energy to do so.

After having K, I find that I've finally grown up. I can no longer be irresponsible for myself. Not only do I have to take care of myself, I have somebody else's life in my hands. How K grows up will depend largely on the values we pass on to him. That is a humungous load/burden/responsibility. Loads of what-ifs float about in my head...

National Day!

Started the day at my in-laws'. And since K looked so good in this Ralph Lauren, we just had to take some pictures.

Then it was off to Sis' place to view the fireworks display. Didn't really take pictures tho' was too busy playing with the kids there and enjoying the show!

My darling and I

Then it was back to celebrate MIL's birthday!!

More photos here

Haven't been blogging much...

Haven't been blogging much these days. I usually only have time to photo blog a little.

K has been sleeping lesser and lesser these days and thus leaving me with less of my own time. Not complaining though. It's really an enjoyment watching K grow and develop by leaps and bounds. He's discovered his fingers and thumbs in the last 2 days and thus trying very hard to figure out how they taste! His fingers are quite yucky and salivery now! It's actually quite gross when he wipes them on me! What to do.. my son!! I love him!

Having a baby really requires one to slow down. Stop and smell the roses (or in this case, the poop). We can still do the things we used to do, just not all the things, all the time. I'm contented to just stay at home the entire day and just watch K grow. I think it's really a mad rush for us, sometimes, to bring K around because we are obliged to do so. He's shuttled from place to place, just because the adults around him have things to do. Or, he's trying to get to sleep and people around him want him to wake up to play! He only has to open 1 eye to peep and everyone around him thinks that he is already waking up and starts cooing at him, insisting that he is awake when what he really wants is to fall back asleep. As such his sleep gets disrupted and then we get upset because he is not sleeping well and say that he is grouchy! What complication!

Everyone says that we have to let baby get used to the noise around him so that he can sleep anywhere and everywhere. How would I like it if someone's blasting the TV while I'm trying to sleep?!! Neither do I go around sleeping in the living rooms of someone's house. So why make baby do that?? Puzzling.

My Baby & I

Lo and Behold! The Odyssey begins!!

Shiok!!

Our new car is here!!

Yipee!!! We've got our new car! It seems that there only only about 10 of them on the road now and I'm sure we are the only white around!! Photos later...!!

This is fun!!

http://www.therightfoot.net/mystuff/whatever/swf/bubblewrap.swf

Weight gain

according to this webbie, i think K is gaining well.. :)

Life's never gonna be the same again!

Nope. I don't mean it in the negative sense. I quite enjoy the fact that we have a little one to share our life now. However, things are quite different already. Every outing is a major operation, every decision has to be made with the little one in mind. It's a good change.

Went out with the cousins (R&S, J&D, A) to watch Pirates of the Caribbean (okie.. reviews for another session). It was only a few hours away from Baby and I was already missing him. Before getting tickets for the show, we had to make sure that there was someone to watch him for us. Still, I didn't like the feeling of being away from him. I missed him so much that I could not stop kissing him when we got back. I just wanted to hold him in my arms and hug him and hug him and hug him... That few hours away from him made me thankful even for the days that he is grouchy and fussy. I think we've been blessed with a wonderful and loving baby.

Another rather major change in the family home is that we've got grilles on our windows. A precautionary measure to prempt the active behaviour of our little one in a few months time. don't really fancy the idea of grills but for the safety of everyone, gotta do what we gotta do.

There will be many more changes to come. Some good, some utterly irritating. I guess we'll just take it one step at a time, enjoying the entire process.

The white elephant

We started putting K on our bed out of convenience for the night feeds, such that it seems that he now favours our bed. His crib is now functioning as a changing station/ clothes holder/ extra table space... I've been trying to put him on his crib to sleep but it seems that he doesn't sleep as long or as soundly as when he's on our bed. So we've kinda decided to dismantle it and keep it till he's a little bigger and convert it into a bed for him. *crossing fingers* hopefully he sleeps in it then. Or else, we'll keep it for number 2! *wink*

It's a great day!

Today has been a fantastic day so far!! Why?

1. K's been a very good boy. He woke up, drank his milk, played for about 1/2hr, then went back to nap with considerably less fuss as compared with the last few days!! He did this during his 10am feed and just now at 2pm! Good job Darling! I think he knows that he's home with Mummy, and that Mummy will not give in to his tantrums. Ha. Still, it's been a great improvement! Love you sweetie pie.
2. Because K's napping wekk, I managed to do the laundry, clean up the floor and even come online to blog!
3. Hubb's home early today and he bought 20 piece Mcnuggets! It's been a long time since we've done this Mcnugget thingy! It was fun!
4. We had dinner at The Rice Table last night with Aunts, A Jenny, Jus, Doreen, Sue & Reza. We had a good time. Again, K was kind enough to sleep for about 1/2h, thus we all could eat in peace.. haha..

Our rules!!

Got this off someone else's blog:

Hope this time round the folks would be too busy with the firstborn so that Hubby and I can really get a routine down with the second-born.

This time round, NO carry to sleep!!!!

Carry to comfort & calm down, okay, but not to make the baby sleep.

NO bad guilt about milk supply!!!

NO STARING at my boobs while I breastfeed please!!!

NO FORMULA MILK until *I* say so!!!

Basically The Baby Whisperer has a good routine (E.A.S.Y) for babies so that everyone's lives are more predictable and manageable:

E: Eat

A: Activity

S: Sleep

Y: Your time

Looks like the "carry to sleep" is a universal issue!! This is the very problem that I am facing. K simply has to be carried to sleep in the afternoons. However, I notice that he is more so like this on weekends when he is at his grandparents' place. I think he knows that there are A LOT of people there who want to carry him. He is usually quite cooperative when he's home alone with me. He knows that I will not give in to his crying easily and the tantrums stop in a shorter period of time and he falls asleep. Like this morning, he woke up at about 8am with wind in his tummy. I didn't have to carry him up. I just had to rub is tummy, pat him a little and he went back to sleep after passing out the wind. The same goes for his night sleeps. He can fall asleep on his own..

I think that many people do feel a sense of accomplishment when the baby falls asleep in their arms. It's like, "looks, I managed to get the baby to quieten down and sleep!!" *big smile* Try getting him to sleep on their own, that's the bigger challenge!

Sometimes, I feel bad to let him cry and cry when there are other people around. Also, when I allow him to cry, some people look at us, thinking that we are idiots, not to pick the baby up to stop him from crying.

My way of dealing with K is only to pick him up to calm him down and then try to get him to sleep on his own, but NOT to hold him till he is very sound asleep. I think he's so used to being carried that he is now a very light sleeper in the afternoons. He sleeps very well in the arms of people but will wake up immediately when put down. This is not good.. sigh.

Back to the statements above, at least i managed the "no formula until i say so" :)

Still trying to go towards the EASY... whatever it is, I have to be firmer and make everyone deal with K according to OUR rules. They only play with him, we have to clean up the mess that's left behind..

Kieran & Janelle

Took this photo about a month ago. Hehee..

Family Time

We (Us, Skin's family, Jus, Sue-ann) had a picnic yesterday. It was really fun, although the kite couldn't fly, we didn't swim in the sea and we didn't exactly have sandwiches and lemonade (had lemon tea tho'). K also enjoyed a little suntanning haha.. He was so pampered, with us shielding him from the sun , putting sunblock on him...

Anyway, it was an enjoyable time, as everyone was really relaxed and just sitting back, enjoying the breeze.

Sleepless night

K refused to sleep last night. And he was just mega hungry!!

Patience

With K, I've learnt to be really patient and also to take things a lot slower. Feeding sessions with him takes about 40mins at least. It'll be about an hour before I get to do anything else. With about 6-8 feeds a day, I hardly get to do anything else! And that's not including the time spent coaxing him to sleep and playing with him!! But still, I derive great enjoyment and satisfaction doing all these. The most important thing anyone can have is time spent with their loved ones. So, I can't complain about all the time that's spent with K & Hubb. In fact, I wish we have more time together!

Colic: Learning How to Deal With Your Baby's Crying

How does a baby with colic act?

Babies with colic cry more than most babies--a lot more. When they cry, they may draw their arms and legs toward their bodies and may seem like they're in pain. Sometimes they stretch out their arms and legs and stiffen, then draw up again. They may even turn bright red from crying. When this crying lasts for more than three hours a day, it's called colic. Colicky babies usually get fussy toward the end of the day, but colic can happen at any time.
A baby with colic may cry in bouts or may cry almost all of the time. When your baby cries, he or she may swallow air. This may give your baby gas and make your baby's tummy look swollen and feel tight, which may make him or her even more uncomfortable.

What causes colic?
No one is sure what causes colic. Babies with colic are healthy, so it's not caused by a medical problem. Colic isn't caused by the way the baby is handled or treated. It's certainly not the parents' fault. Colic may be caused by stomach pain or the baby's temperament. Babies with colic seem to need more attention and are more sensitive to the things around them than other babies.

How long will the colic last?
Colic usually starts between the 3rd and 6th week after birth. It usually goes away when the baby is 3 months old. If your baby is still colicky after 3 months of age, he or she may be experiencing a reflux disorder.

Things to remember about colic
You didn't cause the colic, so try not to feel guilty.
Colic almost always goes away by 3 months of age. It should go away by the time your baby is 6 months old.
You can try many things to soothe your baby.
Giving your baby extra attention won't "spoil" him or her.
Just because your baby has colic doesn't mean he or she is unhealthy.

What can I do to help my baby stop crying?
You can try a number of things to soothe your baby. These may include changing the way you feed or hold your baby. Try the tips listed in the box below to see if they help your baby stop crying.

Tips on soothing your baby
Place a warm water bottle on your baby's stomach (make sure it's not too hot).
Rock your baby in a rocking chair or cradle.
Put your baby in a wind-up swing (make sure your baby can support his or her head).
Give your baby a warm bath.
Give your baby a pacifier.
Gently rub your baby's stomach.
Wrap your baby in a soft blanket.
Put your baby in a stroller and go for a walk.
Go for a drive with your baby in the car seat.

What changes in feeding may help my baby stop crying?
Try feeding your baby if more than 2 hours have passed since the last feeding. Feed your baby more often and less at a time.
If you feed your baby formula, your family doctor might suggest trying a different one. Warming the formula to body temperature before a feeding may also help.
Try using a nipple with a smaller hole on the bottle if a bottle feeding takes less than 20 minutes. Avoid feeding your baby too quickly.

What about how I hold my baby?
Sometimes babies with colic will respond to different ways of being held or rocked.
Hold your baby across your lap and massage his or her back.
Hold your baby on top of a running dishwasher, washing machine or dryer (don't leave your baby alone).
Hold your baby upright. This will help if your baby has gas.
Hold your baby while walking.

What can I do when I feel frustrated with my baby?
Colic can be very frustrating for parents. Babies who don't stop crying can be hard to care for. Any time you feel tired and frustrated, get someone else to watch your baby for a while.
If you can't find anyone to help you, try going into a nearby room and watching TV or listening to the radio. Make sure your baby will be safe without immediate supervision. Crying will not hurt your baby. Be sure you give yourself time away from your baby so you don't get too frustrated.

Call your family doctor if:
Your baby's cry changes from a fussy one to a painful one.
Your baby stops gaining weight.
Your baby has a fever.
You're afraid you might hurt your baby.

What makes breast milk special?

Sally MyerNebraskaFrom: NEW BEGINNINGS, Vol. 23 No. 2, March-April 2006, pp. 82-83

The most common reason mothers probably choose to breastfeed is the knowledge that human milk is the superior infant food. It contains live cells, like those in blood. Some components of human milk also enhance the effects of others, so the ingredients of human milk work together. In contrast, only a small percentage of some ingredients of formula are absorbed; mixing ingredients in formula does not guarantee they will act together the way they do in human milk.
Human Milk Is Designed for Babies
Human milk is species-specific. The milk of each mammal species has adapted to supply its offspring with what is needed for optimal growth and survival. Some species' milks are relatively high in fat to lay down a thick layer of body fat, while those with high protein use it for rapid growth and maturation. Those species that need readily available sources of sugar to meet the needs of their rapidly growing brains have milk that is higher in carbohydrates. Humans are the slowest growing and maturing mammals, but also have the most advanced brains. So it makes sense that the protein content of human milk is relatively low while the level of carbohydrates is high.

Human milk contains levels of vitamins and minerals appropriate for the healthy, full-term, human infant. It is ever-changing -- from the beginning of the feeding to the end, from feeding to feeding, and from day to day. The infant provides many signals that stimulate some of the changes in his mother's milk. When following her infant's feeding cues, a mother can be assured that her child will benefit from those changes. For instance, if the milk taken at a particular feeding is lower in fat (fat is the most variable constituent of mother's milk), the infant will become hungry again sooner. If his cues are followed and he receives the next few feedings close together (cluster feeds), the higher fat milk he receives (fat content goes up when the breast is less full) will ensure his overall fat intake is adequate.

Human Milk Has Anti-Infective Properties
Breastfeeding mothers often notice that their children are sick less often than children who aren't breastfed. Human milk provides different kinds of defense against disease, including secretory antibodies against specific pathogens. It also contains lactoferrin, which not only is the source of iron for breastfed infants, but also appears to have antibacterial and antiviral properties. Other components in human milk protect infants on a molecular level because their actual shape hinders certain pathogen's access to the infant.
Because human milk has protective qualities, infants who are not breastfed have more emergency room visits, hospitalizations, and treatments with antibiotics. The protective effects extend beyond weaning. (See the table below.)

Human milk offers immunological protection against many chronic diseases. According to Outcomes of Breastfeeding versus Formula Feeding, compiled by Ginna Wall, MN, IBCLC, and Jon Ahrendsen, MD, FAAFP, human milk feeding is associated with less risk of the following diseases: celiac disease, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, sudden infant death syndrome, childhood cancer, autoimmune thyroid disease, appendicitis, osteoporosis, cardiovascular disease, helicobacter pylori infection (associated with gastric ulcers), Crohn's disease, colitis, juvenile rheumatoid arthritis, obesity, tonsillitis, allergies, atopic disease, and asthma. (This comprehensive report can be found at www.lalecheleague.org/cbi/Biospec.htm.)
The mechanism of these apparent long-term immunologic benefits remains unclear, although theories abound. Human milk contains bioactive components that enhance the growth and development of the human infant.

One gastrointestinal hormone, cholecystokinine (CCK) signals sedation and a feeling of satiation and well-being. During suckling, CCK release in both mother and infant produces a sleepy feeling. The infant's CCK level peaks twice after suckling. The first peak occurs immediately after the feeding. It peaks again 30 to 60 minutes later. The first CCK rise is probably induced by suckling; the second by the presence of milk in the GI tract. The drop of infant CCK levels 10 minutes after a feeding implies a "window" within which the infant can be awakened to feed from the second breast or to reattach to the first side for additional fat-rich milk. Waiting 30 minutes after the feeding before laying the baby down takes advantage of the second CCK peak to help the infant to stay asleep.

Human Milk Contains Essential Fatty Acids
The essential fatty acids in human milk optimize cognitive function and vision. Studies have found that premature infants who received human milk via feeding tube were more advanced developmentally at 18 months and at seven to eight years of age than those of comparable gestational age and birth weight who had received formula by tube. Such observations suggest that human milk has a significant impact on the growth of the central nervous system. Also, breastfed infants have higher visual acuity. These benefits of human milk can be attributed to the presence of long-chain polyunsaturated fatty acids, docosahexanoic acid (DHA) and arachidonic acid (AA). Although some formulas have recently added these ingredients, it is unknown if they will have similar effects long-term.
The hormones, live antibacterial and antiviral cells, and essential fatty acids are just some of the reasons why human milk is the vastly superior infant food. It is a truly unique substance that cannot be copied artificially.

Editor's Note: This article originally appeared in the Nebraska Area Leader's Letter.
Resources
Lawrence, R. and Lawrence, R. Breastfeeding; A Guide for the Medical Professional. St. Louis: Mosby. 2005.
Riordan, J. Breastfeeding and Human Lactation. Sudbury: Jones and Bartlett 2005.

Ashes to ashes

13 Jun 2006

Zee zek's funeral is finally over. His body was cremated and ashes placed at the Mandai columbarium. I couldn't attend the wake or the cremation as baby still hasn't cleared his first month. I really wanted to say bye to him myself.

Hubb said that everything was very simple. He went there all the nights and stayed with zee zek the whole of last night. He said that it was peaceful, the place where the ashes were placed was beautiful.

Now that zee zek is in a much better place, it's time for us, the living, to pick up the pieces, be strong and live.

Loss of a loved one

Zee zek passed away in his sleep yesterday morning. It was a peaceful departure. I believe that he is in a better place, free of his physical disabilities and most importantly, he is with God.

Hubb and I are already missing him, i can only imagine the greater sense of loss in Aunts, Jus and Alden's hearts. However, I also know that they will be strong and they will get through the next few days. Now we should not mourn the loss but celebrate the life that zee zek led.

Both him and Aunts were so kind to me when I 1st met them 3 years ago. They gave generously when we moved to our new place, when we got married and also when Kieran was born. I'm glad that Kieran managed to know his zek gong, even though it was a brief one.

Multi-tasking

Since having Kieran, I've really become more apt at multi-tasking. Look! I'm typing this entry using my left hand. I realised the need to be ambidextrous if I want to be able to get things done. My internet times are usually clocked while feeding him. It keeps me awake, especially during the night feeds and in doing so, it leaves me some free time to do other things. I thnk he's going to grow up, an internet junkie... haha...

On bringing up children

The scariest thing about having children is not the 9 months pregnancy, neither is it the 10h labour. It is really the lifetime of bringing them up to be independent, self-reliant (are they the same?) individuals with integrity.

i do not need my children to be brilliant doctors and lawyers (tho' Daddy has been saying that to Baby even before he was born.. haha..), but I just want them to be able to stand on their own 2 feet. I also just want them to be OUR children. I don't think that is very much to ask for.

As new parents, I only want the 'space' to be able to bring up my kids the way we want them to be, to have the 'space' to make the mistakes that we should be making and to find out what works and what doesn't with our little one. Afterall, everyone else who has had children already had the chance to do so. And if they feel that they didn't do it right the last time round, I am sorry to say, "your opportunity is over, this is someone else's assignment now". Also, if they feel that they are more "experienced", I would say, "thank you for your advice, but I will see if they are applicable to my children. Please do not impose your thoughts and your values on me. I am afraid they may be very different."

I want to be able to know that we have done our best to provide for our children and that whatever went right with them, we were part of it. Also, I do not want to live with the regret/ guilt/ resentment that I have to blame someone else for anything that has may not have gone as we have desired.

ps: I want my children to grow up knowing that Daddy and Mummy will always be there for them, always...

Endurance

When baby refuses to sleep at night, it is really a test of endurance. It's like a battle between the parent and the baby. See who can outlast the other!

I am quite surprised that I could stay up with baby for about 5 hrs last night and still wake up at 9am this morning. This is only the 1st night. Can I do this every night for maybe another week, until I figure out the amt of milk that he drinks in the night?? Whatever it is, I MUST go on.

God is my refuge and strength.

When to change Kieran's diaper

Lesson learnt last night: Change his diaper AFTER he has fed.

He is really angry when he doesn't get his milk and angrier that someone's messing with his diaper when he's trying to get his milk!!

Changing diaper after feed reduces diaper wastage. Last night, he pooped 5min after I put him in new diapers.. urgh..

Labour Pains...

This is going to be a very long entry as I want to record everything down.

I was right about myself all along. I was more fearful of needles, pain from the drip and epidural (if I had to take it). On the whole, I thought that the contractions were bearable with the help of painkillers. Of course, I am very thankful that Hubb was so encouraging and supportive throughout the entire ordeal process. I don't think I would have made it through without him by my side the entire time, giving me encouragement, calming me down when I panicked and firmly passing clear instructions from the midwife to me. Thank you baby!! I love you.

What exactly happened in the labour process to deliver Kieran?

Pre-labour:
Rather long pre-labour (about 2 days)
Started with the lost of the mucous plug on 15 May
Thought it was the ammniotic fluid leaking and went to see Dr Lim. He said that the cervix was closed and still long. Also, the ammniotic fluid was not leaking.
"Bloody show" on 16 May

Early Labour:
1 contraction on 16 May
Few irregular contractions in the evening of 16 May
Pain level: very low. Very much like PMS cramp. I didn't even realise that they were contractions. Just thought that tummy was uncomfortable.

17 May Morning:
Woke up at about 4am because tummy was hurting. Contractions were getting stronger but still very low intensity. Didn't make much of it and feel asleep until about 7ish in the morning. Contractions started coming in regularly at about 10-20min intervals, each contraction lasting about 30s. Still couldn't confirm if they were contractions or they were the after-effects of the internal exam done 2 days ago. Didn't even want to call Dr Lim cos I've been calling him almost everyday for the last 2 days. Was getting a little paiseh about it already. Was convinced by Hubb (again.. ) to call him at about 10am. By then the contractions were really quite regular, though they were not very painful. I just had to stand still when the pain came. Moving made the intensity increase.

We were intending to go by Robinsons (sale!!) to see if we could buy anything for baby. We still contemplated whether to pop by Dr Lim's first or Robinsons!! Haha!!! Thank goodness we went by the Dr's. He checked and said, "ok, admit to Mt A". Both our jaws just dropped. The cervix had already dilated 2cm. According to Dr Lim, half the work was done over the last 2 days. As i was feeling hungry, we went to have lunch and then admitted to Mt A at about 1.30pm. I was quite glad that we didn't go shopping, cos the contractions really got stronger during lunch.

The contractions came and went, all bearable until Dr ordered the oxytocin drip at about 5pm. Once the drip went on, the contractions started becoming stronger. By then they had already put the monitor on me and I was on the bed. Dr came by at about 6pm and broke the water bag. The intensity of the contractions really increased after the membranes were broken. (Dr estimated 4hrs to delivery at that point). About 1/2hr after the bag was broken, the pain started to become rather unbearable. I was already using Entonox once the drip went on. However, the gas was getting a little insufficient for coping with the increasing pain. At that point, I asked Hubb if I should go on epidural. I actually had time to think about it and finally decided not to. I hated it when the nurse administered the drip, cos the stinging pain was so unbearable that I actually teared. At that point, I told Hubb that I didn't want epidural. So when the time came to decide, I did hesistate a little, but Hubb kept telling me that he believed that I could do without it. So I chose pethidine instead.

Pethidine really works. Once the jab went in, the contraction pains lessen in about 5mins. And they became bearable with entonox again. I was so relieved. However, that was quite short-lived. Once the transition stage started, it was almost scary. The cervix has not dilated to the 10cm mark and thus I was told not to push when the bearing-down feeling came. The contraction starts with about1 bearing down contraction at the end of each cycle and progressed to a full bear-down feeling everytime the contraction comes in. It was really difficult not to push when the contraction came. I think that was a very difficult period cos it was really a test of willpower and determination to go against nature. When the time came to really push for the baby to come out, it was almost a relief to go with the flow of the contraction. I think I still couldn't push hard enough as Kieran was finally delivered with assistance of the vacuum. But, I guess that's alright as he came out safe and sound. And as usual, Hubb said to me that most importantly, I tried my very best to bring him into this world.

Summary:

• Labour pains are really bearable with the right encouragement ( i think the antenatal class helped)
• Pethidine works. Should consider this option before going straight for the epidural
• Do not disregard any symptoms that you are unsure of. Just call the Dr to check it out.

Painful events (in order of pain intensity, most to least):

1. insertion of drip,.
2. administering of anaesthetic to the perineum for the episiotomy (which I screamed "it stings" even in the midst of contractions).
3. I think was the crowning of the head. I didn't know what the sting was but judging from the time interval I felt it and the baby arriving, I should think that was it.
4. labour contractions

The sweetest sound I've ever heard: When he cried so loudly as the Dr pulled him out

The most beautiful face and expression I've ever seen: When he was placed in my arms and when he stared at me, matching my face to the voice that he's heard for the last 9 months.

Everything was worth it. When Kieran was placed in my arms, I knew I would do anything in the world for him.

Botak Jones

Hubb and I went to try out Botak Jones (AMK branch) yesterday. Hubb thought that it was too hyped-up already. I thought that the food tasted not bad. The presentation was much much nicer than the usual hawker-center style western food. Then again, for the price that we paid, it had better be.

Here's what we ordered:

Swanky Franky
super large sausage on a bun (really huge), topped with loads of onions

Botak Burger
150g beef patty with loads of onions, veg etc.

Both were served with Fries and slaw. The meal cost $15.60. Not too bad for bistro-style food in a kopi tiam.

What is an early contraction?

I am getting totally confused. Labour is such an imprecise science. I don't know what to expect, don't know what to feel...

baby, can you just give Mummy clearer signs??

Let's look at the series of events:

• leaking some fluid that's not ammniotic fluid
• "the bloody show" with 1 contraction that has a bit of pain (was that even a contraction?)
• Many tightening contractions with no pain

What's up man??!!

False alarm

Okie, the leaking was a false alarm. Not the ammniotic fluid.

Pre-labour??

Called Dr Lim just now. Told him about the symptoms. He said he cannot be sure, but since there is no contraction-like pain, I can still stay at home and monitor. Said to go in to the clinic tomorrow morning to get it checked out.

Mother's Day

It' s Mother's day today. We had a seafood dinner last night at Tyrwhitt Rd and well, it was okay. However, I'm now down with a bad tummy. I'm wondering if it was due to the dinner last night (as I chomped down the belachan fish) or it is signs of prelabour (like I read on the web).

Anyway, according to hubb, I'm not eligible for the Mother's day celebration as I'm technically not a mum yet!! :P It means that I do not get a mother's day pressie!!! *blah*

Birthday Pressie

We didn't do anything really fanciful for my birthday, just had a nice dinner and came home after that. Hubb got me a pair of pearl earrings and I really loved it. It's something very different from the rest of the earrings I have at home. Just that I have to take very good care of it!! It looks more fragile than the diamond ones, I'll try to clean it after I wear it every time so that it'll last.